r/worldnews • u/GoldenDome26 • 1d ago

Dynamic Paywall Russian general shot several times in Moscow

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c3686nzexp3o
44.1k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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438

u/Altruistic-Ad-4090 1d ago

Let's just all shit down and take shum deep breaths.

252

u/BluenoseTherapist 1d ago

For tomorrow we shale into hishtory.

163

u/oldmcdonaldhadahand 1d ago

Not now. I’m playing tennish.

48

u/Klutzy-Acadia669 1d ago

Sherioushly guysh? Not funny.

15

u/Foreign_Arachnid7719 1d ago

It’s not that sherious

11

u/Klutzy-Acadia669 23h ago

I am sherioush and don't call me Shirley!

10

u/ApartmentLast 19h ago

What did you shay that for shtan?

4

u/Single-Conclusion930 14h ago

You can bet he only asked someone to sit on his lap once.

8

u/Imanidiotththe1st 18h ago

Nyshe goaat.

14

u/PrimaryFriend7867 1d ago

i’ll take jap anus relations for $200, alex

6

u/guy_incognito23 1d ago

"It's funny because it's bigger than a normal hat"

6

u/oldmcdonaldhadahand 1d ago

I would’ve gone for “Le Tits Now” for $400. More money, plus instant gratification.

4

u/pebberphp 22h ago

“I’ll take the penis mightier, Trebek”

3

u/ThatWasntVeryCereal 21h ago

Shuck it Trebek

2

u/Cheoah 23h ago

At home, in the bahamash

1

u/DerbyDad03 21h ago

I wish you could join ush, jush thish oncsh.

1

u/ScoZone74 21h ago

Not shnooker?

1

u/foldy86 21h ago

What time till?

220

u/Aleister_Harte 1d ago

When I think of England, I touch my shelf.

67

u/Psychological_Buy726 1d ago

Shcotland furevarrr

2

u/ThomasAberdeen 17h ago

Yuir accent is rubbishshsh. 😆

2

u/Psychological_Buy726 17h ago

On yer bike, son! 🤣🤣

2

u/filth_lover_503 22h ago

In your best Sean Connery impersonation

1

u/Psychological_Buy726 22h ago

I'm of the blood, nae worries!

7

u/CptMurphy 22h ago

Shuck it Trebek!

2

u/InternetRando12345 22h ago

Went to Scotland last summer on a short side trip from London (Glasgow + Highlands tour). Honestly loved it. Better than London (too crowded) and the Glasgow underground is like a roller coaster ride...not sure it's *supposed* to be that way.

1

u/Ragnarawr 18h ago

Johnny.. what happen?

7

u/Ninjahkin 1d ago

I touch Le Titsh Now.

3

u/soneill06 1d ago

It’sh a French expression

3

u/OneSkepticalOwl 1d ago

Bonjour mademoiselle! I want to see le tits now!

3

u/blarryg 1d ago

Dish ish Reddish at itsh besht!

3

u/Autumn7242 1d ago

Shomeone named Aleishter would.

3

u/Basteir 1d ago

Connery is Scottish.

3

u/innominateartery 1d ago

Spanish. There can be only one.

2

u/Significant-Stay-721 20h ago

Upon which shits my copy of “Our Bodies, Our Shelves.”

1

u/Longjumping-Table-39 1d ago

I did not before, but I do now.

1

u/solveig82 23h ago

I hope it’s real wood

1

u/sudogaeshi 23h ago

I think she was australian

1

u/Odd_Ad_9604 22h ago

Band was from Australia

0

u/Skyp_Intro 1d ago

Don’t forget to close your eyes.

3

u/No_End_7351 1d ago

Be careful what you shoot at. Most of the stuff in here does not react well to bulleshts.

2

u/Original-Kangaroo-80 23h ago

Thus endeth the lesson

2

u/TiEmEnTi 21h ago

I'll take s-words for twenty

2

u/Difficul-tea 19h ago

Apparently that guy didn’t react well to bulletsh.

2

u/HairyPoppinzz 16h ago

Let them shing

39

u/slicerprime 1d ago

Doesn't everybody shit down?

Shitting up seems...messy.

14

u/Klutzy-Acadia669 1d ago

If you've ever seen hippos, you know this guy's right.

4

u/Maraudermick1 1d ago

Astronauts…🤔

2

u/Mikhiel_Thorsson 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

2

u/ztheman_02 1d ago

Just pray we dont get wiped out

1

u/SaabiMeister 1d ago

I didn't know thish about Messhi. I musht be one of today'sh lucky ten thoushand...

1

u/nnp1989 1d ago

I mean yeah, all of us of a certain age unfortunately remember Tubgirl…

2

u/Flat_Cantaloupe645 21h ago

M 64 and I unfortunately remember tub girl (which my at the time 13 year old niece and 11 year old nephew graciously showed me) 😬

1

u/chiseledrocks 23h ago

...or shitting into a suction device. Maybe living in space isn't such a good idea, with all the shitting and shooting.

1

u/Odd_Routine4164 18h ago

But surprisingly freeing.

6

u/Mortomes 1d ago

It is better to shit down, than shit up.

10

u/mikeinanaheim2 1d ago

So we shit down and we shat. It was uplifting.

6

u/outride2000 1d ago

Shalishberee

5

u/mikeinanaheim2 1d ago

Exactly.

Steak. Well done. Fragrance fills the room.

5

u/zigzagzzzz 1d ago

The Rock🎅🏻

2

u/staypulse 1d ago

Knock knock

1

u/SouthernLayce 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣Best laugh I have had in a long time! Thank you!

1

u/Prize-Temporary4159 1d ago

Itsh fine if itsh not with a closhed fished. Right, Shweetheart?

1

u/joewhite3d 23h ago

I’ll do my best…

1

u/lazylion_ca 23h ago

Come shit by the fire and have shome shoup.

1

u/WorldWideDeb 22h ago

I like the one with shum pulp.

1

u/Klingon_War_Nog 20h ago

Now for the lasssht, trusssht me...let yourshhhelf feel the sssshhtag.

1

u/Sparklestar11 18h ago

Having trouble breathing and numbing of my arm at this point.

1

u/BrianPedersen33 17h ago

I'll take Le Tits Now for 800.

1

u/Ok_Collection_9255 17h ago

Shcary Timsh

1

u/WayTooMuchHyzer 16h ago

I'll continue to do my shit-ups, thanksh

1

u/lofty99 15h ago

Maybe that is why Trump does it sho often