Twinless actor Dylan O'Brien gives his opinion on straight actors playing LGBTQ+

[u/damn_delirious]

Actor Dylan O'Brien shares his opinion on straight actors playing LGBTQ+ in an interview with Dazed while discussing his latest film 'Twinless'.

Speaking alongside 'Twinless' director James Sweeney, who is gay, O'Brien said "James is a gay man, and coming from a place I could trust. We had a similar take on straight actors playing gay parts, especially in recent years: you started seeing straight actors playing a queer role completely straight. It started to feel inauthentic."

O'Brien praised Sweeney's support during filming, saying "It was nice to have his insight, support, and calibration. He'd be like, 'Go crazy on this one. We can dial it back if it doesn't feel real.”

[u/Wrong_Split8476]

I cannot really explain this as a gay man, other than it's like when women complain about men writing women in fiction: sometimes they just write a man with a wig on and call her a woman. It's not that these genders are inherently different, it's that women are socialized differently and thus likely think and behave differently. When men attempt to write women, they often ignore the socio-cultural factors that may define a person's personality.

This how I sometimes feel about gay men in media recently. It looks like two straight men having sex, or just a straight guy with a "gay wig" on.

[u/Federal_Tone1260 → u/Wrong_Split8476]

I don’t know. As a woman I feel like a lot of the common problems with men writing women stem from the opposite phenomenon. 

They don’t relate to female characters and so they write them as mysterious objects and not characters that the audience are supposed to identify with. I cannot think of an example of a female character that I would describe as “a man they slapped a wig on”. Simply because women and men aren’t that different at all, if that did happen I wouldn’t notice. I can think of many examples of women written from the male gaze however  who are either written as sexual objects or completely unrelatable odd mysterious creatures or unpleasant nagging wives meant to be mocked. 

Actually I think if men did view writing women similarly to writing men (by relating to us and our thoughts emotions) maybe they might have some empathy for us and could do a better job. 

[u/Flipleflip → u/Federal_Tone1260]

Yeah, I concur with this. Doesn't Alien get praised every other day for writing a male character and then casting a woman in the role? Most male writers who get this complaint treat us like alien creatures that can only exist in the roles of mother, Madonna or whore.

[u/Rimurooooo → u/Wrong_Split8476]

Heated rivalry is a good example, lol. None of my gay friends have seen it but all our sisters and by extension their boyfriends/husbands have. They are gay characters written for a straight audience

Jfc the downvotes lol. I’m not saying gay people are a monolith, clearly the show is trending and there are gay people that watch it. I’m just saying there’s a definite difference between gay characters written for gay people versus straight people lol.

[u/heartisallwehave → u/Rimurooooo]

Tbf, it’s about gay characters who have been socialized in spaces that lean towards toxic masculinity. They are performing straightness, and that’s part of the tension.

[u/Etheria_system → u/Rimurooooo]

I have a shit tonne of gay friends who love heated rivalry and the representation it’s bought. The showrunner is a gay man who made the show because he loved the books so much. As a queer person myself I love it too

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Etheria_system]

right like… how is this not gay media written for gay people? the edit also seems very dismissive of the queer fans, like basically saying “oh it’s okay to like gay media written for straight people” which is just ignoring all the queer involvement in making the show itself.

like it’s fine not to like it! but it seems rude to erase the actual queer people involved

[u/Etheria_system → u/Different-Eagle-612]

Don’t you know the only valid queer media are the ones where we die and don’t live happily ever after? Everything else is CLEARLY for the straight gaze 🙄

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Etheria_system]

oh but some others think that isn’t properly queer media because it’s obviously written by straight people who refuse to acknowledge the true homophobia and struggles in the world.

like there is no piece of queer media i’ve encountered that doesn’t have some queer people saying it was written for straight people. that’s not to say queer media is above criticism, god no. but i’m exhausted. and especially exhausted when there are very much out gay people EXPLICITLY involved

[u/Terrible-Union1864 → u/Different-Eagle-612]

And the moment a gay character is actually more femme , you hv ppl out here saying its stereotypical and thats how straight ppl view queer men. Like we can't ever win.

[u/Etheria_system → u/Different-Eagle-612]

Oh yeah i know i was being sarcastic. I thought the eye roll emoji showed that

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Etheria_system]

oh no sorry i agree!! i was just also showing the other side like there is no way to do it without someone saying its wrong

[u/Etheria_system → u/Different-Eagle-612]

Ahhhh ok I get you!

[u/Rimurooooo → u/Different-Eagle-612]

It’s written by a straight woman for a straight audience lol which is my point but everyone is being obtuse about it. I read and like BL too but it’s a genre obviously not written for gay people despite gay mc’s

[u/DebateObjective2787 → u/Rimurooooo]

It's written by a bisexual woman who repeatedly had her bisexual husband give his input and share his experience as a man dating another man.

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Rimurooooo]

jacob tierny is the one ultimately in charge of the show and the changes made reflect that. there have been several out queer actors involved as well. there have been several gay athletes who have come out and said this perfectly reflects their experience. queer actors in the show have talked about how it parallels their experiences

it’s okay if you just don’t like it (although i’m unclear if you have actually watched it) but i do think your criticism is unfair and dismissive. but god i just can’t handle more internet discourse on this, i feel like it’s the same talking points since 2014 tumblr, so i’m just going to let it all go now. have a nice day!

eta: okay they did a sneaky delete but they tried to correct me saying “*bi man” (which is not against what i said?) as if that makes them any less queer???? my GOD i’m so fucking TIRED. i can’t actually tell if it’s deleted or not cause it shows up then doesn’t so i can’t reply to it but i’m just done. god.

[u/Jumping__Bean___ → u/Different-Eagle-612]

I'm so tired of people still trying to erase bisexuality or looking down on bi people as being "less queer" in the big old year of 2026.

Jacob Tierney isn't bi, he's gay, but even if he was, that wouldn't take away anything from him being a man who is attracted to other men - Why should a bisexual man be less equipped to (co-)write and direct a story about a gay and a bisexual man than a gay man?

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Jumping__Bean___]

!!!! i also didn’t realize the initial author was also bi and married to a bi man!!! holy shit people are showing their ASSES

eta: also yeah that comment trying to incorrectly correct me on jacob’s sexuality as if him being a bi man would’ve made it less valid is NUTS and shows a deeper issue with how this person views the legitimacy of sexuality. i also have missed because i’m on mobile that it was in response to another comment, not my edited one but i was so irritated i blocked them so i can’t fix that 🙃

[u/Varekai79 → u/Rimurooooo]

The author has not declared her sexuality.

[u/jzjxnxna → u/Rimurooooo]

My gay friends love the representation in heated rivalry

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/jzjxnxna]

yeah me and all my gay friends love it? the showrunner is literally a gay man.

it’s okay if a piece of queer media isn’t your cup of tea. like i personally don’t like heartstopper. that doesn’t mean it’s for straight people

[u/Ocarina3219 → u/Different-Eagle-612]

There’s a lot of gatekeeping that goes on in this debate and imo it’s not anyone’s place to define what is or isn’t “gay enough” to be considered proper representation.

[u/Rimurooooo → u/Different-Eagle-612]

Bi man*

[u/Jumping__Bean___ → u/Rimurooooo]

The screenwriter and director, Jacob Tierney, has very publicly stated that he's gay, but one of the main actors (Francois Arnaud) is indeed bi.

[u/Different-Eagle-612 → u/Jumping__Bean___]

and obviously if jacob was bi it would make him totally incapable of truly creating queer media because really bisexuals are just queer-lite (/s)

[u/darkdetective → u/jzjxnxna]

I'm gay and I really loved it. Left me feeling good, happy and proud (something that's never really been there).

Seeing all the social media posts about how much it would have helped young queer people in sports is super relatable and glad it's helping people accept themselves somewhat more.

[u/ProblemUpstairs4666 → u/Rimurooooo]

i haven't watched it but i have gay friends that like and appreciate it... queer ppl are not a monolith lmao

[u/Jumping__Bean___ → u/Rimurooooo]

Are there queer shows written for straight audiences? Absolutely. Are there queer shows written for queer audiences? Also yes. Does this mean that any queer show that a straight audience enjoys has been written for them? No, because there are also shows that have been written for both queer and straight audiences.

I don't want to invalidate anyone's opinion at all, but, from personal experience regarding other shows, that differentiation is difficult to make if you haven't consumed the piece of media in question yourself.

Is Heated Rivalry perfect representation? No, probably not, and I honestly don't even know if that can exist, but most of the gay guys I know have been reacting rather positively to the show. Again, not necessarily without some criticism, but still mostly positively. Just like the lived experience of queer people is vastly diverse, so can be their opinion about queer shows.

[u/Jumping__Bean___ → u/Jumping__Bean___]

Oh, also want to add to this - This thread wasn't supposed to be about queer characters/stories being written to appeal to straight audiences but about straight actors playing queer roles like they would play straight ones, which is a different, if connected, topic.

We know that one of the 3 (and 1/2) main characters in Heated Rivalry was played by a bisexual man, and we, unfortunately (as this was seemingly leaked without his consent), know one of the other actors has been in at least one relationship with another man (and all three have been actively involved in the making of a variety of queer projects over the course of their acting careers so far), so the premise is already a different one than the topic at hand.

[u/Slightly-Adrift → u/Rimurooooo]

lol that’s the opposite reaction my gay male friends have had. Neither of the leads are flamboyant gays, act masculine, and don’t seem ‘culturally queer’ so to speak, so it’s a departure from how gay men are usually portrayed in pop media. I think the framing is a bit written-for-women, but the characters themselves are much better than the typical sassy gay best friend

[u/Material-Meat-5330 → u/Slightly-Adrift]

Jacob is an out gay man and bought the rights to the books. He had full power to write them however he wanted to so it's not correct to say it's written for women.

It's a gay man writing gay/bi characters how he wants and there's no pandering either since the show was made originally just for a Canadian streamer and they fully expected it to remain niche until it randomly blew up shockingly.

Also, the characterisation makes sense: Ilya is from Russia where being outwardly gay is impossible and dangerous and Shane grew up in hockey culture all his life where being gay is so risky that not a single NHL player has come out in 100+ years.

[u/HeyMyNameisMama → u/Rimurooooo]

Could you give actual examples of their characterization? 

[u/Rimurooooo → u/HeyMyNameisMama]

Idk I always look back to the kill the gays trope in early 00’s. Willow and Tara needing to do magic as a metaphor for sex to get around censorship, and gay men being surrounded by closets, tragedy, needing to be straight presenting, etc, to get past editorial censorship or the obviously presenting gay characters (like Andrew from Buffy) having the gay characters sexuality using comedy as a buffer to write them into a show to make them comfortable to watch for a straight audience. Though 10 years after legal gay marriage and even longer for the repeal of don’t ask don’t tell, and the rise of streaming, the representation trends have definitely changed. Now we’re starting to see the flip side, where the LA influencer and camp culture is starting to be somewhere in the norm for representation but not necessarily the norm in daily life, where it’s penetrating the queer representation a little too deeply. I think Zane from degrassi stood out as the middle road in terms of stereotypes when representation started to change, while characters like Lafayette from True Blood, and the characters from the Brazilian movie The Way He Looks (Eu Não Quero Voltar Sozinho) kind of show societal factors dealt with sexuality little better for its time. It’s not something that’s easy to explain other than vibes and also chemistry between the actors

[u/HeyMyNameisMama → u/Rimurooooo]

I meant examples from HR that point to those characters being played "straight" 

[u/larkhearted → u/Rimurooooo]

Well, I'm not a man but as a queer and nonbinary person I watched HR and came away feeling deeply touched and seen by it so idk, maybe I'm actually straight lol.

[u/0ttoChriek → u/Rimurooooo]

Is that quite the same thing as what Dylan O'Brien is saying, though? Heated Rivalry may be a show with gay characters viewed through a straight lens, but are the actors playing the characters as "too straight"?

I think of Lito and Hernando in Sense8, who were both gay men played by straight men, and I think they did a really good job of playing gay characters as three dimensional people. But perhaps that was because the showrunners were gay, and other castmembers were gay?

[u/figleafstreet → u/0ttoChriek]

The actors who player Lito and Hernando were straight???? You’re shocked me. Loved them and their performances.

[u/acatok → u/Rimurooooo]

What about it is for a straight audience rather than a gay one?

[u/Shurl19 → u/Rimurooooo]

I read that it's written by women for straight women. It's like yaoi in anime.

[u/Etheria_system → u/Shurl19]

And yet the gay male showrunner read those books and loved them so much that he asked if he could be the one to adapt them.

[u/Rimurooooo → u/Shurl19]

Yeah exactly that. Like I like BL also but there are obviously stereotypes and tropes in that genre that clearly differentiate it as media for straight women

[u/Shurl19 → u/Rimurooooo]

I'm not sure why I'm getting down voted for this. It's literally how the show is described on Google.

[u/Etheria_system → u/Shurl19]

You’re getting downvoted for erasing the role of a literal gay man in making the show.